114 | Are You Ready To Live More Free?

Hello beautiful humans,

Where to begin?

As I end a lovely Sunday off on my couch, writing the first official letter kicking off these weekly Sunday Letters again, I'm sitting with that question. It's also a question I've been sitting with for a number of months.

We find ourselves asking this question throughout our lives.

Sometimes it's because we are stepping into something new, like moving to a new city or starting a new job.

Sometimes we ask that question when navigating change or realizing we want to change.

In my case, I suppose it's all of those reasons.

A few months ago, my two and half year relationship with my partner ended. I've also been accepting the truth of needing to find a new job, and this month, my 40th birthday is approaching.

These events have been catalysts for a lot of reflection on my life; on where I've been, where I am, and where I'm going. But really, the external has shed a light on the internal.

I attended an event today around living a liberated life, and something one of the speakers said echoed in my head.
 

“Life will present you with people and circumstances to reveal where you’re not free.”
––Peter Crone

As I realize some of the ways I'm not free, or perhaps, not living the life I want, it's easy to get down on myself, rather than see the open door in front of me.

When we're hurting or struggling, we can get stuck in wishful thinking and ignore the truth of the reality in front of us. But it's also through our pain we can find our way. As Rumi said, "The cure for the pain is in the pain."

The reality is that things are always changing. We live in a world of seasons and cycles. Things end, and things begin. There's beauty there, and there's grief there.

One of the biggest ways I've realized I'm not free is one I know I'm not alone in, and that is, I haven't been loving myself well.

When we're not loving ourselves, we're not living free.

If we truly loved and valued ourselves, there are so many things we wouldn't let ourselves be bound by, like the fear of failure or being judged or being unworthy. We would accept ourselves and express ourselves fully. We would believe in our worth and treat ourselves with respect and compassion.

As I learn to love myself again, or rather, learn the next iteration of loving myself, I always want to keep compassion front and center.

In learning to love ourselves, we must bring compassion, because just as any relationship is a journey and a process, so is the relationship we cultivate within. Loving ourselves is not about arriving at some point of totality where we've learned it once and for all. It is a life-long practice, but one we can grow in.

It really is about the journey, and though we may not always feel like we have the power to choose our lives, the truth is, we each get to decide what we do next.

So, are you ready to live more free?

Let's do this together, one day at a time

Here's to choosing truth.

Here's to choosing to love ourselves.

Here's to beginning again.

Sending love your way,
Shel